You should imagine the title to this post being muttered under the breath in a male voice with an Israeli accent. Make it a nice, thick accent, just for argument's sake. If you don't know what an Israeli accent sounds like, please consult Youtube.
So, today I spent some time once again trying to convince Sasha that rather than be an innocent bystander, he should once again write on the blog. Yes. I am a nag. BUT, I have a reason. Actually, I have several.
First. He is good. Go back in the archives (way back) and have a look if you have any doubts. Second. I really enjoy writing with him, I like reading what he has to say.
But it's more than that. And of course, me being me, I had to think about what my motivations were and try to understand WHY I want him to come back and write so much, and what the "more than that" was. And as usual, a post that starts as something small will most likely grow to encompass a larger issue.
So let's start with -
Everything that irritates us about others... Can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. ~ Jung.
I like talking (or more accurately Im'ing) to Sasha because often times he has a very different perspective of things than I do. Sometimes his responses are irritating, especially his refusal to just accept my explanation of things, and even more especially... when he plays the devil's advocate just for the fun of it.
But then I have to analyze why it irritates me, I have to look at things from a slightly different perspective because I want to understand why he sees a particular issue so much differently than I.
Our conversations can be challenging, but I appreciate that. Even more so, when we write together (this isn't the only place we have collaborated, this is just our non-fiction jaunt), I get a better picture of how he sees things, and it challenges me to work a little harder to get past my own cultural confines. In other words, I feel like my conversations and collaborations with Sasha make me a better writer. I have written some of my best posts here as a response to a conversation that we have had. I have written some of my best fiction work in collaboration with him.
Now, it has probably never occurred to him that he motivates me to write better, but he does. He isn't afraid to say "really? This is it?" or to tell me if I am being sentimental, or to challenge my ideas. I value that. He may not even realize he does it, it is just Sasha being Sasha. It is just him giving his observations.
Perhaps much of it is my own construct, but the fact remains, he is a good writer and makes me want to be a better writer, so this is a large part of my motivation.
Moving now to
Friendship is unecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of the things that gives value to survival. ~ CS Lewis
On a personal level, Sasha and I have been online friends for quite a long time now. The tide ebbs and flows, but we still manage to get at least a "hey, how ya doin'?" in from time to time. I have said before, I wish I could know Sasha, and his family, face to face. I wish I could go sit and have a beer and pizza in the little pub down the street from his house that he frequents. I wish I could have arguments with him and yell and have 3 different conversations at the same time while waving my hands in the air. I wish I had friends that challenged me as much as this one, distant individual from another country does. Again, he probably doesn't even realize, he is just being Sasha. I think much of the challenge comes from what I think he is thinking. So it grows into a bigger thing than it may actually be, but he planted the seed, so there you go.
I like to think about things. Whether passively or purposefully, he makes me think about things.
I like his perspective. I like trying to unravel the complexities of his culture, and I hope I open a broader window into my own. That was what this blog was all about in the first place, trying to come at ideas from different sides of the world, and reach understanding. At least for me. Because this kind of thing fascinates me...
And, I have a strong desire to step out of my own back yard. I want to know the world, and understand why it is the way it is. I want to peel back the blinders of my cultural bias and social conditioning and see things from a different point of view. I want culture shock. I want to experience difference. Right now, this is as close as I can come... challenging myself here, and talking to my distant friend. One day I will travel, perhaps I may even travel to Israel. But for now...
I like those times when the realization hits me that we are so different.
It drives me to understand. That is really my deepest motivation. Understanding. Which leads us to -
A bigger picture perspective...
Truth springs from argument amongst friends. ~
Hume
It is diplomacy on a small scale. It is the concerted effort to understand the other, and it makes me more aware. I read the news more, I pay attention when I hear the NPR guy talking about what is going on "over there," because "over there" is no longer nebulous and distant. It is real, and much closer, because my friend is "over there," living through what I am only listening to. I wonder what is going on, and if things are alright.
So... I start reading newspapers from "over there," history, commentary... in the attempt to understand.
The internet is an endless sea of porn, shopping, reddit, 4chan, empty blogs, ranting lunatics, and more porn. But occasionally the internet offers us a gem beyond value. Awareness of the plight of individuals or groups... the seeds of budding democracy... access to withheld information...
Understanding...
Even if it stems from a conversation and collaboration between two distant friends.
Maybe Bill is right...
The Internet is becoming the town square for the global village of tomorrow. ~ Bill Gates.
At any rate, it makes me think. I share my thoughts with others, and they share theirs with more. It's small, but it's worthy.
And there, I have again managed to make something large out of something small. And in so doing, Sasha has beaten me to the post. I hope we see much more of him around here.
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