Against the Wind...

Today's post is dedicated to two friends... one new, and one dear. It is my wish for their success, despite the heavy layer of expectation laid upon them by family, friends, and society in general.

We are social creatures, (I will be discussing this in detail in my next post), and love to set norms, expectations, and dictates regarding what is "normal," "healthy," "sane," "acceptable," "right," "the way things should happen," etc. As a result we cause each other a tremendous amount of stress, pain, heartache, anxiety, and uncertainty. This can make embarking into an unconventional relationship frought with obstacles, most of which are the opinions of others.

Why do we care so much about what other people think? It's easy to say "the hell with what you think, I am doing my own thing!" Actually undertaking your own thing in the face of social/familial/peer disapproval can be quite another matter, however. And if we DO step out, it is usually with a great deal of cognitive dissonnance... "Are they right? Am I being foolish? What if I fail? What if this person is terrible? What if everything goes wrong? What if...?"

And from the perspective of the peer, the urge to bring the individual who is deviating from the norm back into compliance is nearly irresistable. What drives this in us? Again, a discussion for the next post.

 It is debatable why we do this to each other, there are many theories (and by theory I mean scientific explanation, not guess or conjecture). I have respect for people who are strong enough to still pursue their own mind, despite what others may say or do in order to keep them following the norm.

If we could overcome some of this, we might open ourselves up to the possibility of more happiness. It's deeply ingrained, however.

One wonders.

At any rate, I wish my friends all the best. I wish them happiness and success. I wish them longevity and trust and wonder. I wish this to work out.

And if it doesn't.. well... I told ya so.